*smiling*

last night, Alpha was telling Abby and me about her dream. we told her dreams may mean many things. it can be just a residue of a day or hidden desire of the heart or a warning.

After so many days or even weeks, i was able to remember a dream. hehe. sabi nga ni ivan, lucid dream. fortunately, it was a good dream. a very good dream. it really made my day.

the dream

the dream was set in a beach resort...with benches around a bonfire. parang summer outing. rough estimate of around 30 people. people in groups, talking, drinking, laughing and some just sitting with other people.

in a bench with sandalan,a girl (my hs classmate), a guy i dont know (pero in my dream, i know him), I and a gay friend, in respective order, were sitting and talking.then, next thing i know, the guy's right hand (i was sitting on his right) was on my lowerback. at first, i didn't resist. kasi in my dreams, close kami. we know each other, not someone i just bumped into. pero in a while, i felt his hands moving, tipong rubbing my back. so what i did, i tried to stop his hand. i used my right hand and tried to hold tightly his wrist to stop him (all of this happening behind my back as to not to catch attention). the guy was playing around. he tried to hold my hand. his hand was so warm. i could have easily just given up and continue holding that warm hand. but no, i was firm on stopping him. i didn't know na he's doing the same thing sa highschool classmate ko on his other side until i heard the girl say, "ano ba?!" when i finally took hold of his wrist, i stood up and so did the other girl. i just walked on...no idea where i was going. i was furious at the guy. taking advantage. and i was just walking and walking around the bonfire (or at least around a place the light of the bonfire can reach). the next thing i know, i fainted...i thought i was about to fall straight on the ground...

but someone caught me just before i fell. hmm...i felt safe. and i felt i have no care after that.

next thing i knew, i was lying on a long bench, covered with blanket. i feel cold. i can feel my feet were so cold (yeah.when i feel cold, my feet feel like they are frozen.). barely moving, i took a glimpse at my feet because i felt someone was moving around my feet. i saw someone ( i was shocked to see that it was that guy pala who caught me), lying beside my feet, trying to cover them.i can feel his hair on my feet. the guy thinks i was fast asleep because i heard him say when he took his head off my feet for a while, "tsk.payat kasi.wala tuloy cushion." but then, he put his head back on my feet and covered them again. and i felt warm.

right now, i feel my heart grew five times its original size. antaba-taba niya. i feel so overwhelmed. i could cry just because. tell me to cry anytime now, and i can. without reason. this dream made my day, regardless of the guy who made me feel i am his queen goddess.

letter to you

to you (kahit di mo naman alam na ikaw to kasi di ko naman sinabi sayo), thank you. thank you for writing a smile on my face the moment i wake up. thank you for saving me kahit sa dream lang. thank you for taking care of me, for making me feel warm, making me feel i'm important, like i'm your queen goddess. sabi ko nga, whoever the guy was, it doesn't matter. pero it doesn't erase the fact na ikaw yung asa dream ko. thank you for making me feel the way i'm feeling right now.

sa dream ko, i chose your strong ang secured arms over that warm and welcoming hand of the other guy. and i am thankful i did. sa dream na yun, with you, i feel so safe. thank you.

ikaw siguro talaga ang dreamboy ko.not because you're an epitome of my ideal guy, but because hanggang dream ka lang ata talaga(bitter ba?lol.hindi naman).

pero masaya pa rin ako.:)

everything may have been a dream, but i know, the feeling is real.

There's only us, there's only this
Forget regret, or life is yours to miss
No other road, no other way
No day but today